A couple of days ago I read about an new posh trend: steaming your cooter.
Seriously? There are some women on this planet who are willing to plunk down $50 just to squat over a steaming pot? Who are these women? WTF is wrong with them that this seems like a good use for their money? Do they really think the monchichi is such a disgusting area that it must be give a ritualistic exorcism of stank? If they do think that steam on the naughty bits would make them feel “fresh”, why don’t they just squat over a little steaming bowl at home? Why spend money so a stranger can bring them a little open-crotch stool to set on while she places a little fragrant steamer under your Hooha?
Apparently this can be done for medicinal reasons in some countries, in an attempt to help with menstruation issues or infertility. Fair enough. But why are they doing it here? Will it make the labia look more refined? Will it give your snatch higher cheekbones? Will it make your clitoris look festive? Why, in the name of all that is Holy, would you pay money for this procedure?
Since I am in the area (har) let me go ahead and bitch about high colonics. (Click the link at your peril. For some reason they want to show you what is “eliminated” from the colon. Barf.) Regardless of what you feel about the medical benefits of this procedure, it is simply an enema. You can go to just about any pharmacy on the planet, get an enema kit and give yourself one of these so-called high colonics at home. But the word enema isn’t cool enough for movie stars. Nope. They rave about the “cleansing ritual” of a high colonic. I’ve got news for them; they are still full of shit.
With the hair trimming and waxing and vajazzling and anus bleaching and labiaplasty and steam cleaning and the colonics … why are ‘privates’ now such an area of scrutiny? The pubic had become public. I don’t mind a wider acceptance of nudity, but it bothers me it must be constructed as artifice. How is vaginal remodeling any better than the corset or foot binding that used to “correct” the female body into a more aesthetically pleasing form?