The beast known as an Ur-asshat is an asshat that with the “combining form [Ur means] “earliest, original,” and is “used in words denoting the primal stage of a historical or cultural entity or phenomenon: ur-civilization; urtext.” When I call Pat Robertson an Ur-asshat I am asserting that he is the prototypical asshat from which all other asshats are molded. He is, in short, the nadir of asshattery. It is almost impressive, in a skanky way.
Robertson has recently reinvigorated his reputation as the most horrible Christianist on TV by telling a 17 year old boy that his father’s neglect of his mother was probably all his mother’s fault because she was secretly “hard-nosed”. Uppity bitches with autonomy deserve to be treated badly, don’t you know! And since no woman is EVER treated badly unless she is an uppity bitch, QED the fact the kid’s mom was being treated like shit MEANS that she is an uppity bitch. This is a great lesson for a 17 year old boy to learn, is it not?
Then Robertson had to give the addendum of this “joke”:
“A woman came to a preacher I know — it’s so funny. She was awful looking. Her hair was all torn up, she was overweight and looked terrible … And she said, ‘Oh, Reverend, what can I do? My husband has started to drink … And the preacher looked at her and he said, ‘Madam, if I were married to you, I’d start to drink too.’”
Ha ha! Hee hee! There is nothing funnier than the idea of a woman going to a spiritual leader for help and advice in dealing with a spouse’s addiction and being told that alcoholism is the result of having an ugly fat wife like her! See? If the dumb cunt was pretty she wouldn’t have any problems in her life whatsoever!, because all of her problems relate to the fact she is not meeting patriarchal standers of attractiveness! Isn’t that a riot? I am busting a gut, here!
Normally I would tell Robertson to suck my metaphorical dick, but frankly I don’t want him that metaphorically close to me. He makes my skin crawl. So I can tell to go lick a dead goats anus. That way his breath will match the odor of the words coming out of it.